Our Token Holiday Decorations

 

The winter holiday season used to be an exciting time of the year for me, filled with festive parties and happy social gatherings with my family and friends.

I remember the smell of cinnamon and nutmeg.

The delighted sounds of my children’s laughter.

The twinkling lights and beautiful decorations.

I used to throw myself into the festivities at a feverish pitch, vowing each year to have the best tree ever, the most perfect presents ever, the most joyous family reunions. Ever.

Now our grown children are spread out all over the country, have families of their own, and are busy creating their own Christmas traditions.

Ed and I made the decision several years ago to no longer engage in the holiday frenzy. All of the hoopla just doesn’t make sense anymore for our lives. We live far from our extended and nuclear family; we seldom eat rich foods; and we don’t need more stuff in the form of presents.

Not wanting to be complete humbugs, we contribute to our community by helping decorate our poolside clubhouse, and we have hung a single strand of lights on the front patio of our desert casita.

Although it feels great to withdraw from the hysteria around us, somewhere deep in my subconscious, I think I must be lacking, deficient, imperfect.

And that makes me almost unbearably sad.

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