ED AND I — MOVING INTO OLD AGE TOGETHER
My Ed just had a birthday, so he’s now in his 80th year. How is that even possible?
When I was young, 80 seemed really old! But clearly, the older we are, the higher the number gets that signifies “old.” According to a Pew Research survey, respondents ages 18-29 believe that the average person becomes old at age 60. Middle-aged respondents put the threshold closer to 70, and respondents ages 65 and above say that the average person does not become old until turning 74. That’s not long before the average person dies!
One of the lessons we have gleaned from the past seven years of researching and writing the story of Dr. John and Clara in CALLED, has been that none of us is ever too old to learn and grow. If you’ve read the book, you know that they took on the rugged and exhausting pioneering work of saving a floundering hospital and the community surrounding it in east Paraguay when they were well into their 80s.
YOUNG DR. JOHN
Their journey in CALLED has inspired Ed and me to keep learning – like writing and publishing narrative nonfiction books and creating a YouTube channel when we had no idea initially how to do any of this.
But John and Clara’s story also reminds us that “raging against the dying of the light,” as NYT best-selling author, Arthur C. Brooks, says in his latest book From Strength to Strength, is a sure strategy for ending our lives feeling miserably irrelevant.
Dr. John’s force of will and indefatigable work ethic led him to change the world despite seemingly insurmountable obstacles. Raging against injustice is what he knew best, even in the face of his inevitable decline. And in the end, it left him feeling lonely and useless as his physical and mental weakening no longer allowed him the adventure of taking on new challenges.
Our eventual decline is unavoidable, leaving us with 3 choices, according to Brooks:
- Deny the facts and rage against decline, setting ourselves up for frustration and disappointment ( John was a master at this).
- Shrug and give in to decline – experience aging as an unavoidable tragedy ( John eventually capitulated into this).
- Accept that what got us to this point won’t work to get us into the future – that we need to build new strengths and skills ( John failed to accept this).
Our next book Healing the Wound: One Layer at a Time, which will launch sometime in the coming year, traces the inner life of Dr. John. Based on his own writing and reflections, the book reconstructs scenes from the embattled life of a great hero, drawing inspiration and lessons for living a meaningful and personally gratifying life, all the way to the end.
OLDER DR. JOHN AND I
And remember, we are together on this journey – to the very end!